Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Dishing It.

How do we feel about discussing other people's relationship situations? All identifying details of parties involved will, of course, be disguised to shield the embarrassed/embarrassing behavior. It just seems like there are a lot of people going through some very heinous things going on out there, and I'd like to help. And I hope some of you are able to share POSITIVE experiences for us to incorporate into our dating lives, that we might benefit through outside, unbiased opinions on the matter.

You wanted relationship issues. And I don't have them, so now I'm asking for yours.
Par Example:
  • Breaking up and remaining friends- Do it or don't it?
  • Dating for a prolonged period of time- when is so long just TOO long?
  • The Lurker- when do you fish or cut bait- and what keeps them coming around?
  • Getting stood up: Proper etiquette post-standing.
  • He's Just Not That Into You- but...Really?
  • He cries, he begs, he doesn't want you to move on- but he's not moving forward, either.
  • Selfishness is not a curable disease.
  • Hooking up: The Reverb.

Those are my ideas. What are yours? Aaaand- GO!


Salt H2O said...

Common Farrah, put on some make up,head to 24 hour fitness on Main and pick up your own relationship issues! Geesh.

Got a cure for male moodiness? That'd help me out- buckets.

Vanilla Vice said...

I am about to cover the inevitable: guys over 30 - will they EVER get married? I'm just not seeing it.

The Dally Llama said...

How about this one:

Well-meaning, but officious people who point out that I'm not married, and that I should probably get married: Do they REALLY think that that is lost on me? Do they REALLY think that making such an awkward (if not inappropriate) observation somehow helps?

(Sorry, you touched a nerve)

f*bomb. said...


I live to touch your nerve, Dall.

caroline said...

my friend's bishop recently related a story to the relief society about how a former ward member came to him asking him why she's not married and he said it was because she "talks too much" and that she should go home and pray and fast about it—and now she's "happily" married. i would say let's talk about that, but apparently as a female i shouldn't be talking at all.

Broek said...

Care, interesting thoughts. I don't know enough about your friend or her bishop or their conversation, but I was thinking...

She asked someone trusted who she believed would offer insight and he gave her an answer, albeit one that came off harsh. But she asked. After hearing it, she should trust in her ability to receive personal revelation, to find out if that is true or not, and go from there.

Some PEOPLE talk too much, and maybe that was the girls PERSONAL problem the bishop was addressing.

It's not easy to hear straight talk advice from someone who possibly knows or sees you from a different perspective, but if you ask a question, it's possible you won't like the answer. What's especially jarring is the truth, there's no easy way to do it.

One's problem could have been to "Listen more in conversations and not be afraid of occasional silence" and it wouldn't sound as offensive.

That's where personal reflection and prayer should come in, so one can examine "Is this true?" If not, I bet one could go to their bishop after humbling them self in prayer and say, "I prayed about this, and the answer I received isn't that I talk too much." And the bishop would have to agree, if not, then he'd at least have to respect personal revelation.

Anyhow, I love this onion article that expresses the way most guys feel about talking in a familiar vernacular...

f*bomb. said...

I've advised women to shut up PLENTY.
And men? Well...We all know they're mostly decorative anyway.

Morgan said...

Maybe it wasn't that she "talks too much" but that she talks too much about not having a boyfriend? Like Broek, I wasn't there but I agree with her assertion that if a person is asking for an opinion, don't be offended when that opinion isn't what one wanted to hear.

caroline said...

yeah, i guess taken out of context of the whole lesson my friend heard that day, it could be coming from a good place. but the rest of the lesson she told me about made me immediately assume offense. it's too long to go into here, but it seemed pretty sexist overall. so that's why i assumed it was negative. i've been told to be manipulative to get a man to be interested in me and to seem less self-sufficient, so maybe i'm just projecting my experience onto that situation. i just think that if something is a true problem, then yeah, self improvement is great, but hiding a big part of your personality or water yourself down to get someone to like/love/marry you is just asking for trouble. and that's where i was coming from when i posted that.

this was a long response, maybe i should pray about my talking too much as well...

Broek said...

naw...you're fine girl. In fact I wished you talked more, especially to me. =)

I'm for watering down depending on the affliction...

Advice/opinions are difficult because people usually address the characteristics in you that they find threatening or out of sync with their personal standards of acceptability. And the goal of courtship is to be approached for dates so naturally they might focus on whatever they personally don't jive with.

I think you should wear a burka too Care. Too Hottt.

f*bomb. said...

Yeah, Caro. Geez. Chatty McCathy...I wish you'd just shut up already and get back to baking in the kitchen WHERE YOU BELONG.
Caroline is SUCH a loudmouth it's reedikulus.