Thursday, September 27, 2007

I Concede.

That's it. I give. You win.
The statistics have shown me; there are (on average) over 100 readers from various parts of the country (a few overseas) who check in every day to read Blogg. I am so completely flattered. If you feel even a twinge of what I felt on Fridays when
Herb Cain columns were published, you may get some inkling of how excited I am to have other people interested in my writing. You've given me a teeny dream come true, my lovelies. Thank you. Thank you.

The other thing your stats have shown me; you really like what I have to say about the things I actually spend surprising little time actually thinking about. Between polls, general surveys, and responses to postings, it's clear you want to hear more about dating and relationships- and I can't blame you. My goodness, is it interesting. But here's my confession: I don't care. I don't really think much about dating relationships- probably because I'm not superkeen about dating in general and experience has taught me that I am just this side of "too logical" to really think much about "silliness with boys" (as my grandmother says). Plus- as we all are- I'm busy! It's hard coming up with new stuff every day for you to read and not comment on!

Do you know what I think about? All day? Music. Really. Seriously. All day long, I listen to it in-between NPR reports and when I'm getting ready in the morning, and when I get ready for bed at night and everything in-between, I sing to myself. I have been known to sing myself to sleep and have been caught laughing in my dreams. Probably because I'm dancing around in most of them.

So here's the thing, dear loyal, trusted readers- I give. I will give you what you want, but you gotta help me out here. I will still gratuitously post my favourite videos and songs and playlists for beloved iPod, but I want your input, too. Tell me what ails you- what questions do you wish you could ask about relationships, or what stories can you share, or what answers are you looking for? While I don't love twittering about boys in MY life, I LOVE being helpful, and I love being a voice of reason in a world full of finger-pointing and sexist "Mars and Venus" theories. Most of my close girlfriends will admit that they use me as their soundboard when male behavior mystifies me; apparently I think like a man, but thankfully, I can express it as a woman.

So now it's your turn: Tell me what you like. Tell me what you want. Knowing me, knowing you, you'll get whatever you dang well please. Feel free to do as my close friends do, which is email me material, pictures, scenarios, conversation bits, etc. Whenever, whatever. You can reach me
here.

*Rhyll asked for a Hello Kitty diamond ring, and what does she get? This is called giving the people what they want. GIVING IT TO YOU EVERY DAY. xoxo, -f.

20 comments:

linds said...

Keep the Prison Break posts coming. Those make my day!

f*bomb. said...

haha- those are for YOU, babe! Totally- between supplying you and my roommates with respective eye-candy, this Blogg could be purely a parade of Dreamboats!
(For another sunny-delightful day, click on the Topics list: Dreamboats.)
mwah!

Rudie can't fail said...

Oh. So Blogg is taking a new turn. I will be happy to participate and hopefully benefit from the sage wisdom of you and your legion readers. So here goes...

(BTW did you guys see that Wentworth did an interview with some German magazine last week where he strongly affirmed than he is not gay, just very shy, and would really like a girlfriend? I can track down a link if you need. Fangirls, resume twittering.)

Dear Farrahspot.blogspot,

People try to set me up a lot. Friends, family, strangers, Mormon, Non-Mormon, doesn't really matter. I once had a complete stranger call me up and say, "You don't know me, but I'd like to set you up with my wife's cousin." I once had a flight attendant set me up and get so excited that she actually picked up the airplane phone on the back of the seat and called the girl on her cell phone. She got voice mail so she then called this girl's mother, got her on the line and handed the phone to me. The stories go on. I guess I have a face that says "I'd be perfect for ________."

Anyhoo, I got a call from my Uncle last night, and he has a new girl for me. She is perfect, he says. Blonde, brilliant, beautiful, thin with big boobs. (His description, not mine) Here's the catch...She's 23, I'm 34. She lives in Provo, I don't live in Utah. There was a time when I would have loved a blonde Utah County girl, but now I'm not so sure. She is apparently expecting my call. Meeting her would require a trip to Utah, which seems like a lot for a blind date. How would you suggest I handle this situation?

Yours,

Rudie

f*bomb. said...

AHHAHHAHA! Aaaah, Rudie. Sorry, man. I just laughed so hard at your expense that I just hit my head on the keyboard.

Darlin, I just wouldn't know WHAT to do. Considering no one has ever tried setting me up because nobody has a clue what the f* to do with me, I'd take it as a compliment. Then tell them not to insult your intelligence by setting you up with someone so clearly underdeveloped in age, experience and wisdom. In fact, maybe you should just tell them you're dating me. And send a photo, please. My mother probably wants to know who you are.

f*bomb. said...

Okay- so I omitted- I HAVE been set up. Twice.

Three things that promise for an unpromising blind date (True Story):
1) He owns multiple pairs of white linen pants and lives in neither Miami nor 1984.
2) He called me "hunny," multiple times...ON THE FIRST DATE. TO THE MALL, no less!
3) He owns guns. And a "Check into Cash" place in Vegas. I don't know which was more unsettling.

The other one was with a guy who was 55. I didn't realize it was a set-up until he kept calling, asking to see me again. Thanks, Mom.

linds said...

Rudie- I heart you! Seriously. Wentworth won't be so shy when he gets a piece of me!

rhyll said...

uh, is anyone else interested in this link to wentworth saying he's not gay? all in favor say aye. POST IT.

also, rudie, (without coming onto you) if you could post a picture of yourself, i think we'd all be a little less curious. i for one want to know what a guy who seems perfect for everyone looks like.

f*bomb. said...

Apparently, he looks like Wentworth Miller...

caroline said...

i also have been set up with pretty much everyone. my personal favorite is when the person setting me up hasn't actually met the person, but is friends with his mom who says he's super awesome. guess what mom? your son just broke up with his live in girlfriend who was 20 and asked me to meet him at the 7-11 and tried to tell me that the city i grew up by and currently lived in had an underground city that you could buy buzookas (sp?) in. what a gem.

my new rule is: you have to meet the person and have more reasons than we are both single and "i think you both are nice". i guess he did give you the skinny with big boobs reason. what more do you need than that?

Rudie can't fail said...

Sigh. Ladies - I can't believe you have to get your dreamboat updates from me. I have never even watched that show. The article is in German GQ.

http://www.gq-magazin.de/gq/2/content/18150/index.php

I can't find a direct link to the article, but english summaries are all over the web, such as here:

http://televisionista.blogspot.com/2007/09/wentworth-miller-im-not-gay-im-shy.html

He also gives a top six list of things that make him happy:

#6 LITERATURE
#5 EVIAN WATER
#4 THE SIMPSONS
#3 SCRABBLE
#2 ABECROMBIE & FITCH
#1 REESE'S CHOCOLATE

You ladies may want to start carrying some of that stuff around with you, just in case. Actually, on second thought, literature, Evian and A&F? That list just screams heterosexual, doesn't it?

This will be my final comment about Wentworth or any other male dreamboat.

As for me, I don't know why people always want to set me up, but it has been this way since my senior year in college. I went through a two year period where I only got set up with progeny of General Authorities (or in one case, a member of the RS presidency). I am a reasonable good looking guy, but people don't usually go around screaming "Wow, Rudie's so HOT!". I am unfailingly polite and usually smiling, so that might have something to do with it.

Oh, I'm also currently sitting on a phone number of a girl who apparently lives near me, is 27, and a school teacher. How did I get this number, you wonder? Well, A couple of weeks ago my grandmother in SLC went in to see the allergist/immunologist. They started chatting and somehow I came up. (Don't ask, I have no idea) My grandmother told him where I live, he said, "Is he single?" "Why yes" "My sister lives near there, and she is beautiful." So her number passed from the immunologist to my grandmother to my mother to me. I realize this must be a strange situation, but stuff like that has happened so regularly it doesn't even seem odd anymore. 3 weeks ago I was at work dinner and was seated next to the wife of one of my partners, whom I'd never met. She said that they have been talking about who they can set me up with.

"I have this great friend, she's 30, beautiful and owns her own boutique downtown."
"OK"
"She just had a child, though. Is that a problem?"
"Ummm, well--"
"But not from a relationship. She was artificially inseminated because she didn't want to miss out on kids."

I passed on that one, but the stories go on and on and on.

Vanilla Vice said...

Farrah, the problem is, you and I haven't been talking on the phone as much so that you can listen to me rant about men and then blog about it. We all know I'm the obsessive one. See latest blog about men being DRAMA KINGS for details.

farrah said...

Actually, I guess it might count as a set-up when the woman who came to take my grandfather from our house when he passed away gave her son's phone number to my grandmother, saying that I should call him (apparently he's new to Huntington Beach). I'm all for fellow-shipping, but I just don't know how, "Hi (total stranger), your mom gave my grandmother your phone number when she took my grampa to the funeral home..." conversation will go...

But I DO have a soft-spot for a good Boston accent...

f*bomb. said...

Abercrombie & Fitch? gag. Like I said, Ladies. He's all yours. I'm a Lincoln woman. (And probably a Rudie-girl, too, because, really- aren't we all?)

rhyll said...

caroline, i've actually been in need of a bazooka for quite some time. if you could go and get me one i would pay you back, i swear. farrah, tell her i'm good for it.

and that abercrombie & fitch thing has got to be a lie. i KNOW it.

Salt H2O said...

Speaking of music...Farrah maybe you can explain why the spawn of icons from the 80's all try to be rockstars- first there was Thick, then Hulk Hogans daughter- now we have Rooney (who's lead is the son of Adrianne from Rocky's 1-4) thoughts?

caroline said...

rhyll,

i put in a call. they are on backorder and will let me know when they are in stock. i'll keep you posted. and since this "underground city" is below chinatown, i hope it's o.k. if your bazooka has hello kitty all over it.

best,
ck

Silvs said...

Heyyyyyyyyyyyyy, I think I love you, so what am I so afraid of?...

We should be friends. I love when a person's blog inspires me to want to be friends with that person. You're awesome. Just keep crankin' out those posts and I'll keep dropping by babe.

f*bomb. said...

Silvs- You keep crankin' on the dancefloor, and I'll let you drop it like it's hot ANY DAY OF THE WEEK.

rhyll said...

caroline. i don't buy ANYTHING that doesn't have hello kitty written all over it.

f*bomb. said...

In that case, Rhyll...I have a diamond ring for you...