Costa Rica FEELS like:

And just so you know how jealous you really are, you should check out the ones by my girl, Thursty.

ADAPT.

May 17. 2008

"You can plan all you want, but at a certain point, you just have to realize it's out of your control and you have to let go." So my friend's husband says in talking about how his military training has affected his perspective on life.
15 minutes later, I missed my flight.
I had done all I could do- planned further in advance as I ever have for anything; purchasing a ticket months before the flight date, looking at maps, talking with experienced travelers to Costa Rica, timetabling the girls on our trip, packing and re-sorting 3 times, arriving in LA a day before the flight so not to risk the traffic from Orange County, waking up at 7am so I would be sure to drop the car off at Julia's so we'd be sure to head to the airport no later than 8:15am. And still- after all this- when we pulled up the airport just 1 hour prior to our flight, I realized:
I FORGOT MY PASSPORT.
In my urgency to make certain it would not be misplaced, I left it on the cupholder of my car.

Costa Rica Has:

Lovely views. Cool drinks on the sand.
Key word: Random. Like a deer on the beach beside the jungle. It kissed my hand. Really.
CARNIVAL!!!
Street performers.

This is what Costa Rica tastes like:

Crocodiles. Lots of them.
Candy canes that are currently 70% off. By the end of May, you'd think they'd be free, but not in the Rica!
Mangos. Fresh mangos from the neighbour's tree. This one I climbed. The other one, I shook until I got one. Square in the face. Justice is served...for breakfast.
Hailey found some avocados by the side of the road as well- beans & rice get fancy with us!
And limes. Beautiful, glorious LIMES. On EVERYTHING. Yum.

Kids.

The other day a little boy ran by, tripping along and giggling hysterically. My friend turned to me and said, "Don't you ever wish you could just go back to that time again?" The next weekend I found myself surrounded by kids at Chuck E Cheese. I turned to my friend and said, "something seems very wrong about being here without a legitimate reason to be here...with a kid." He responded, "what are you talking about; you have a bunch of friends who act like kids!" He's so very right...

Except they're in way better shape than kids...
And we wear way higher shoes...
And we can drive already...
He's right. We're just like kids, only hotter and with no bedtime.

But the giggling? It's always funny to hear...

package

A guy recently asked me what kind of man was I interested in. I said, "Not anything grand- I don't really have a type or look; just a good guy who is kind that I could have an intelligent conversation with and still laugh a lot." He looked at me and goes, "So- basically the whole package...That's going to be hard to find."
Talk about a bleak outlook.
Do you really think it's expecting too much? It seemed a reasonable set of expectations to me at the time, but what do I know? What does it really take to go from being attracted to someone to dating them?

Ladies: a survey to lend some clarity.


Men: because we're just so darn curious!

Feel free to add what "other" is on the comments section. It's all anonymous, so vote away!

The Wait is Over!

Thanks to Krista, I've learned that, "The Wait Is OVER!" Apparently I've been waiting for this- and I'm sure you have, too- and it's happening May 15!
So far, it looks like most of their tour is based in Boston (lucky Katie!) and it makes me proud to see they're not wussing out and kicking it like "NKOTB" (which I always resented as a moniker because it required me to have to think too hard to get the initials correct). I loved the New Kids when they WERE new...apparently they got much edgier and cooler by the time the NKOTB phase of "Hangin' Tough." I didn't like them rough, those New Kids. I liked the soft, sad pleadings of "Please Don't Go Girl," so reminiscent of the Four Tops or other MoTown crooners, or the pure pop-joy of, "I Wanna Be Loved By You," and the playfulness of their first album's singsong-y introductions.

Will the world ever tire of poorly choreographed manboys with harmonizing falsettos in matching outfits? Lord. I sure hope not.

Run.

If a breezy, friendly jog along the gorgeous, palm-lined streets of Newport Beach sounds nice, sign up.

If a 5K with your friends sounds fun, sign up.

If you don't think paying to run sounds cool, but ending it with a gamut of pizza, burritos and creme brulee from the finest dining in Corona Del Mar sounds worth an hour of your time, you're in my division.
SIGN UP!I've never been one for being noble through sports and fitness:
I don't run to cure cancer, I don't walk to stop AIDS, and I don't relay to save the children. But you'd better believe you put a burrito at the finish line and I will hustle something fierce.

Hi, Cupcake!

So I've been on this cupcake kick lately- it's true. I've always liked them, but now I'm into actually baking them. (CeeKay would be so proud.) It began by wanting to thank my friends for their help with packing and moving, and it's a luxury to be cooking and baking again, so I'm doing it every chance I can get. It should be noted that it's been approximately 4.8 years since I baked anything. It's been about 3 months since I cooked anything besides frozen burritos (if microwaving can count as "cooking" and Trader Joe's banana bread mix counts as "baking.") Okay. Maybe I'm just better at "mixing and reheating." Point being, I've eaten approximately 4 cupcakes a day for the last 2 weeks, and I can no longer fit into my jeans. How can it be that something so tiny, so delicious, so perfectly fit within the palms of my little hand and so perfectly balanced by chocolate frosting to banana cake (or lemon cake) that it would actually begin to affect my body?!?

I like to brag whenever I can, so I'll spill it here (in case you haven't gotten a call or a demonstration as to how much I'd like you to start taking PowerLift with me at the gym). Well, my lift instructor has been lecturing us on nutrition during our sessions lately. She asked last week if anyone had eaten breakfast. I asked if a cupcake counts. Somehow, that was the wrong thing to say in a lift class. She proceeded to push us on eating an hour before class and eat a high amount of protein within a half hour after the class. The next time, I am prepared. I eat a protein bar before class and have plenty of water. The alternate instructor was more of a cheerleader on crack, so I left early, disappointed all my nutritional preparedness had gone to waste. This morning, the banana chocolate cupcakes were on the counter- isn't it better to shove one in rather than go without? I ran after the instructor and my favourite hot-mom-lift buddy from class. Here's the conversation immediately following our session together:

Me: Thank you so much for your class! I'm sad to be leaving since I'm moving to LA this weekend.*
Instructor: You'll have to come visit for the Saturday classes!
Me: Well- you've taught me so much and I just want to thank you.
Instructor: Aren't you cupcakes?
Me: uh...Yeah. That's me.
Instructor: Well- you're still young.
HotMom: I'm working off the wine.
Me: Well- I don't drink, so that's gotta balance out, right?
HotMom: Have 3 kids and trust me- you will.
Instructor: (nods knowingly)
Me:(hopeful) And at least cupcakes have nutritional value!
Instructor: Sure! Fat and sugar!
Me: They're banana! That's fruit! And I put apple-peach sauce in, instead of oil, so that's good, right?
Instructor: Do you even know how much sugar that adds?!?!
Me: (blank) Sugar?
Hot Mom: You can mix in nuts or cranberries and sometimes I'll add raisins, too!
Me: (excited) O- yes! I added chocolate chips!
(I thought their eyes were going to burn holes in my face.)
They: It's a good thing you're young.
Me: O! But what about the coconut I put on top!?!

I guess that wasn't the right way to end my "thanks for teaching me so much about being healthy" speech, and it certainly burst my bubble about how lovely my little cupcakes of death were. If you get a plate on your doorstep, please don't think I'm trying to bring about your own can't-fit-your-pants dilemma...They're meant as a compliment. But. Despite what these women might say- chances are high I'll eat them all before they have a chance to share my appreciation for you. Just know that, if you see me waddling around the gym, it's just the effects of my gratitude for you.

*Let me know if you would like to help me move this Saturday- there might be a cupcake or two involved...

Discomfort #32.

This weekend, I experienced a plethora of discomforting situations. And I am rarely uncomfortable. Whether it's that these men are just socially inept or possibly don't get much exposure to women or (most likely) they view their social settings as an excuse to treat every woman as a potential conquest, I'm not certain. Hence the utter lack of focus and concentration on any single one of us.
Further examples of behavior designed to impress women with awkward behaviour:

Example #32: Talk to her, but spend the entire time looking over her shoulder at anyone else who may be possibly passing by while you do it. That way, you look like you're entertaining and charming and popular to everyone else, except the person you're talking to. Women love that.
Example #45: Turn to the girl next to you and ask, "So, what's your story?" during the sacrament as though you are in a singles bar. Do inappropriately intimate things like touch her jewelry, rearrange her shoes, touch her dress or lean up against her during the hymns. She will inevitably find you charming and feel strangely familiar with you by the end of the first hour of church. You charming bastard.
Example #27: Don't ask her for her number. Don't even ask her name. Just wait until you can interrupt a conversation she's in and demand that she put YOUR name and number in her phone and then tell her that she will be attending XYZ events with you. Then just sit back and wait for her to call!

Remember, Blogg is a setting of safety and we are all here to help one another. If you have any other suggestions for making someone you just met unpleasantly uncomfortable, please feel free to add examples so that the good people in our social circles may demonstrate the proper behavior.